Non drinker dating

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Either accept the glass graciously and then put it down, or simply say, “No, thank you, I don’t drink.” Honestly, most people aren’t as concerned with your drinking as you think—and if they are, they may have a problem themselves.As therapist Carroll says, “People need to learn to have fun and deal with real-life situations in sobriety.When we started going to more parties together, I saw him staring somewhat lasciviously at the alcohol.So I said to him, ‘Hey, don't not drink on my account.’ That opened up the floodgates: Suddenly, he’s getting smashed all the time and we’re going on group dates where everyone but me is getting wasted.”Amy found herself deeply in like after six months of dating, though her gut told her the relationship was dangerous.“I started dating a guy who told me he didn’t drink,” she recalls.“We had very civilized, nice dates but, after a while, I started to catch onto the fact that he really did drink—he was just trying to control his drinking and never indulged around me.When I first decided to get sober, I told my fiancé, “I think I am going to go to AA and quit the booze for good.” His reply: “Awww, I’m gonna lose my drinking buddy? ”As you may expect, that relationship imploded shortly thereafter.So, at the age of 38, single for the first time since I was 25, I was newly sober, heartbroken, and absolutely befuddled.

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“I wanted to believe that his problem had just ‘gone away,’ but I knew better, of course.” Her takeaway?For example: Your partner invites you to a work or family event where alcohol is being served.Should you be open about your recovery or just fake it with water on the rocks?If the relationship becomes serious, it would be helpful for the partner to work a 12-step program to gain insight into the disease of addiction and codependency that often accompanies it.” Because relapse is most common in the first years of recovery—leveling off at about five years—Faulkner cautions that those who are sober be cautious about dating people who imbibe.“If you’re talking about someone with good sobriety dating someone who is a casual or responsible drinker, there isn’t necessarily a problem,” she says.“I hung in there for a few more months but the truth is that I really wanted to drink during that time: He and his friends made it look so appealing.

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