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“She seems more simple,” my trainer would write in response.“Let’s try a different approach.” My meaningful questions would disappear from our shared Google Doc, replaced by simpler, condescending small talk.“Rule 1: Don’t make her think too hard,” the manual says.“When writing sales copy…the goal is to reduce her ‘cognitive load’ so she’s more likely to reach the end and still have energy to write out a reply.” What does a “low cognitive load” pick-up line look like?

“I was working 60 to 70 hours a week and simply didn’t have time to keep up with online dating,” he said.

I’m what’s called a “Closer” for the online-dating service Vi DA (Virtual Dating Assistants).

Men and women (though mostly men) from all over the world pay this company to outsource the labor and tedium of online dating.

The matches I speak to on behalf of the Texan man and other clients have no idea they’re chatting with a professional.

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that these ghostwriting services exist.

At first, my trainer encouraged me to get creative with my replies, but by the third week, I was still getting back extensive rewrites.

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