Sex hookup on the phone

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He reveals why many students avoid hooking up altogether, charting an “anti-hookup culture” that’s more prevalent than one might expect.

At the same time, he explains why, when hook ups do happen, the encounter serves as a de facto starting point for potential long-term relationships.

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It’s confidential, convenient and free with unlimited text message plans. Sometimes, it’s fun to try a more “serious” dating app.But at other times, you want a dating app that just lets you get down to the fun part of dating.“Alcohol can make force seem more acceptable,” explains King, “while pornography can make coercion seem normal.” Relatedly, the more that the hook up becomes normalized, “all other alternatives get pushed out.” Students repeatedly claim “I want to go on dates,” but in a hook-up culture how to do so isn’t altogether clear. King isn’t convinced that it’s the job of university administrations to address the problems of hook-up culture’s perceived popularity.Instead, he encourages professors to help their students see what’s really happening on campuses.What concerns King, then, is not that a tsunami of casual sex is swamping America’s undergraduate population. When the hook-up activity of a few “becomes a norm, assumed to be what everyone on campus is doing and what everyone should want to do,” then “those who don’t hookup think of themselves as outsiders.” This fear of feeling ostracized helps account for the ambiguity of the term “hook-up.” When I asked King what exactly it meant, he laughed. Those who do not engage in sexual intercourse but perhaps flirt or kiss could still pose for the “in group” by claiming, “Yeah, we hooked up.” “Fewer people are hooking up with intercourse,” King says, “but they want to preserve the term’s ambiguity.”Hook-up culture’s perceived normality has additional detrimental consequences.

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